Category

Millennials

My Book of Imperfections: Would you like a copy?

By | Dating, Emotions, Love, Millennials, Relationships, romanticism, Self-help, Single

Each of us has an unwritten but deeply inscribed “book” inside that catalogs our insanities and imperfections… but when do you show your lover those chapters? 

I’ve been enamored, of late, with The Course of Love, a book by Allain de Botton, and his other work exploring and exposing Romanticism. (He has books, videos, newsletters, and more, if the bug of debunking romanticism bites you too!)

He says in one of his lectures that “We don’t need people to be perfect, we just need them to have a handle on their imperfections.” As a dating coach, it’s actually helpful if my clients are straightforward and unabashed about their imperfections – that way we know what to package as “working on it” and what to package as “charmingly offbeat or eccentric.”

De Botton jokes that the perfect wedding gift one could give to one’s beloved is a large book entitled, “My Insanities.” Every one of us is a smidge disturbed. Every one of us can drive or be driven mad. When we say “til death do us part” we’ve just claimed our ticket to a ringside seat on our partner’s insanities – and given them a backstage pass to our own.

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You’re Not Forever Alone

By | Dating, Emotions, Forever Alone, Love, Millennials, Relationships, Self-help, Single, Uncategorized

The thought crosses every person’s mind who is single at one time or another. Will I ever “find the one?” or will I be “forever alone.” The answer is all based on your attitude.

Negativity is love repellent, instantly killing chemistry’s chances of making a match. Meeting people, interacting, and dating are all dependent on the attitude and aura we put out into the world.

For instance, when we first meet someone in a local scene, a first impressions is made in the first seven seconds. That means that the attitude and demeanor that we present will be what people believe we are, at least until there is deeper interaction which is dependent on the first impression. If we meet someone and we have the “I’m forever alone” attitude then we are setting ourselves up for failure, basically we are being a self-fulfilling prophesy.

It’s no secret, a large percentage of the population is jaded about love but it’s also no secret that we can make the conscious decision to change our attitude and present more positivity, even though it’s hard. (P.S. It’s not only millennials that throw out this phrase and feel “forever alone.”)

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